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    September 05

    渺小的小草而已罢了

    今天本来没打算出外
    本来计划就是下班之后直接回家
    结果一个女生说不如我们去SPA吧
    我说不如我们去扶元堂受罪吧
    结果我们下班之后就到扶元堂
    然后去江边的半露天酒吧喝东西,聊天,看行人,吹吹风,车来车往
    然后去吃消夜
    小日子倒是看起来过得挺潇洒自由的
    而在江边喝东西,自己一个人,或者和一两个女生
    好象这样的场景经常在这一年里面出现
     
    发现在很多人的眼中我确实是一个挺自我,挺不在乎别人怎么看待的人
    从年轻的外在张扬,到现在的收敛高傲
    怎样也还是自我
    确实,我承认很自我,不在乎也不想在乎别人怎么看待,我有自己的准则就可以了
    因为我知道,如果要在乎的话,永远都要提心吊胆
    我只做自己认为对的,可以的,就足够了
    别人我不去伤害,那么我自己怎么活总也不关一些无所谓的人事情
     
    其实我也不认为我高傲,我认为不对就不对,不顺眼就不顺眼,没必要去可以讨好每个人
    那当然,我还是要生存在这个世界
    所以由以前的张扬转为修饰
    但貌似即使我怎样刻意去低调,但在别人的眼中,我怎么也只会是惹人注意的角色
    我只是想过得轻松简单一点
     
    但好象在其他人中,我所谓的平凡生活一点都不简单
    其实,我也遭遇过,我也努力挣扎过
    我更多的是希望身边的人开心高兴,自己反而可以不那么计较了
     
    我不是公主,也只是一个平凡挣扎生活的人,也只是一棵渺小的小草而已

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